I didn’t go to college for computer science so I had to create my own curriculum from scratch — pulling from dozens of resources and spending thousands of hours in the process that, if attempted today, could be done in a few dedicated weeks of Treehouse. At the time, I had to flesh out every part of my idea for a piece of software while learning what technologies would be required to build my product.
I, and most every other programmer I know, did not do what you did. We learned to program on our own, too, but we did it at our own pace by playing with and exploring computer technology. We had fun trying various things without the discipline and order of a “curriculum.”
I think the problem is that you tried to go from zero to sixty all at once. You jumped from not knowing how to program to product development, and trying to do both at the same time. This is much more than most people can chew.
Learn to program first. Have fun with it. There are plenty of free online resources to help you. You need not create your own curriculum by pulling in dozens of resources. Just take it one step at a time and enjoy the learning process.
Something like this would be a good start.