When you lose someone you love to disease or accident or crime, you suffer the enormous pain of loss. Your friends and family may try to ease your pain, and it may help a little bit, but ultimately you must wait it out, you must walk through the fire. The fire cannot be extinguished; it will go out in due time.
This is the hard reality. This is life. And death. And taxes.
The only way to endure the pain is through your memories of the loved one. The good and happy memories. You’ll still hurt, but they’ll distract you somewhat from the pain.
I’m not telling you anything you didn’t already know. I’m just adding a bit of perspective.